Invisible Beautiful Things

Its true when people say that you wouldnt know the beauty of things unless you miss them...

Never have my home been so wonderful place to live...

When i came home this time... every little things looked so beautiful...

Maybe i never saw it before...

Words cant describe them...

I think pictures would do...

So here I am presenting them as they appear to naked camera...

They might not be significant but definitely make me happy...

Tough time of past

6 months ago, I was going through tough times... those where the days, i shut the doors from everyone... it was emotionally and phyically painfull for me to live through that phase...

I did write about those experience... but never posted... i felt embrassed and pityfull of my own situation...

since i have crossed that phase and doing well now, they are such a wonderful experience...

so here i am sharing that part of my life...
the two blogs below would give a glimpse of life then...

there it goes...

"Shrinking pockets and expanding clothes"

In recent past, things in my life are not as fine as it used to be…..
Its hard to believe that my life has turned so much that it leaves me with no option but to be silly…
Well explaining makes it difficult… Quoting an example would make it easier…

Today my cousins had come from Chennai along with their friends here… they asked me to show them some places…

Oh God why do people visit me when I hardly have any money left for the week…
My Ego doesn’t allow me to keep my wallet shut…

I did spend some money for those spend thrifts… I had almost spent my four days living expense… that’s when they wanted to see Ghost house… I don know why always people wanted me to lead… God I had to pay for the tickets, but my reserve was not enough… my stupid cousin was scared of the ghost and ran away from the ticket counter… I had to go to him and talk about my situation… It needs a lot of courage for someone to be in my shoes… whatever it was quite embarrassing and shameful… Well I wasn’t left with any other choice…

All the while when I was strolling with them I felt damn thirsty… but did not want to buy water (what if these guys ask for some soft drinks?)… these days even water appears to be very costly for me.. You wouldn’t believe me, after 3 hours of strolling I left them and came back to my room just to have water…

It was late night and I was quite hungry… but (you guessed it) can’t afford for one… That’s when my friend called me and asked me to join him for dinner at his home… That was the happiest moment of the day… U won’t believe, I drove 30 kilometers at 9 in the night just to have food…
Quite silly isn’t it…


"HUNGRY SOUL!!!"

Some people say ‘hungry soul knows no ego, no prestige, nothing’….
I think its true…


Its been months that I have had 3 meals a day…
There where times when I used to skip my food at hostel to go restaurants and have food…
Earlier I used to crib about the quality of food… It’s not an option these days…
I wish someone now and then just appear and give me a treat…


At times I crave for something to eat, that’s when a Chai and a Cigarette does wonders…
Most of the days I go to bed with an empty stomach…
Sometime when I can’t control, I buy a loaf of bread, dip it in water and eat…


Weekends are a damn treat for my stomach, nothing is better than home made food…
In a way I have become like a camel… I eat as much as I can at weekends and store the energy for rest of the week…


Well you can’t say all about this to people, it quite embarrassing…
I wonder why is this happening to me??? Do I really deserve this…

I think that food is the most important thing in life, then comes luxury, love, image etc,.
Only a starving person can understand how much it hurts…
All my life I haven’t starved for food… this is the first time… and It’s really painful…

Lady in the cab…

I was going back home; took an office cab late in the evening. I was sitting in the middle of the rear seat. Congested rear seat made me uncomfortable; must be my unlucky day, I thought.
But turned out to be one of my finest moments in Hyderabad. ..

It takes about 30 minutes to reach my drop point from office. Most of the time I find my cab mates as strangers, so I usually keep myself busy by pondering around some thoughts.

That day was quite different…

There was a lady sitting next to me; must be in her early thirties. For the most of my travelling time she was on phone. All the while I was listening to her. From my observations, I made out that she was a mallu, married with at least one kid. It was her conversation with her family that made my day.

I could remember the person speaking to her mom and kid; Vow it was such a beautiful conversation. Her words filled with love and comfort made me feel at home. On the top, she spoke in a language that fascinates me so much. That was a rich experience of language and love. From her voice I could see how much she misses her family and how she couldn’t wait to get back home.

Though I miss my family so much, I couldn’t express all that when I speak to them. I think, my own personality stops me from being expressive. It is amazing to see how simple words when spoken with love could mesmerize people.

Being all alone in this place, interactions such as these keeps me going. Experience such as these keeps me reminding of the wonderful moments with my family and friends in past.

Man! I miss them so much. Never have I appreciated them for what they stand for. All I could do now is regret and treasure those moments with them.

Cross Roads

You know what; I started to write something else but landed up writing this…
Sometimes I can’t stop thinking about certain things that I always try to avoid…
Moments of void, gets occupied by these thoughts…

Recently I am being troubled by memories of the past…
I was a different person then… loved that life so much…
I wonder how a couple of events could entirely alter a person’s life so much…

Today I stand in cross roads, in my professional and personal life…
Do not know what to choose… either way I end up loosing something important to me...
For time being, I am just going with a flow…
I wonder when I would step up and take responsibility of making a choice…